I really like your new drawing on holding hands in public, especially
because there is a sense of voyeurism with being watched from all
coordinates, East, West, North and South.
I also noticed that your initial sketch was called, "Happily
Holding Hands in Public". But in your finished piece, you called
it "Holding Hands in Public."
That is a distinct difference. Are you aware of why you changed
I think the couple was initially happy but then became
self-conscious and their happiness subsided.
It was unconsciously
related to my thoughts about Adam and Eve eating the apple—that
it made them aware of their nakedness (sin).)
Was it a movement from
the utopian to the reality? Was
it even conscious? Please tell me more.
This morning, I am thinking about the somewhat ludicrous nature of
plans. We make all sorts of plans to manage our time, rather than
have it manage us. And then of course, the plans usually shift.
I think of myself as a jazz musician. I lay down a plan or a basic
melody or rhythm. And then i get ready for the improvisation
or someone to play a different tune.
We have a performance for the Girl Scouts on Saturday at Maryville.
We have been trying to get on their calendar for three years. It
is often slow going to understand and fit into the culture
of an organization. So we are thrilled to be finally doing this.
There is nothing like performing for kids. On a good day, you
can practically see light bulbs go off in their heads as they make
the connection between performance, the lived experience of the people
on stage and how they, as young audience members want to think and
This possibility for transformation is largely what keeps me in the
grueling business of scheduling and grant writing, and tech rehearsals.
The idea that we can do something that has meaning in an insane world.That
we can, trite as it may sound, really make a difference.
Now it is looking like all of the usual support structures to get
us through this important inaugural performance with the scouts may
be gone. Sarah, my assistant has her monthly meeting whit
the CAT (Community Arts Training Institute). Ashley, our assistant
director is having a medical procedure today that may put her out
of the loop.
We have a lot of performers on a small stage and no one to direct
the traffic because I had planned on narrating, not stage managing.
It will work out. Because it has to and because everything
finds its own form. But the tune that I laid out initially will not
be the one that I will be playing on Saturday. Too much has shifted
unexpectedly since we started.
I'm not much for plans, so I once decided I would give a slide
show with the slides randomly
arranged. It was a terrible experience and convinced me that
even though there
are an unlimited number of good ways to do something, there
are still ways that are not good at all.)
Yet another sign of the
importance of staying in the moment. And
also of preparing fully for something and then being willing to
throw away the plan.
Wed, Dec 7, 2005